when they actually go to "bond" ther will be some aggression. My larger female once in a while, goes on a tear. She will drag the smaller male up and down the tank by a fin. He then flips on his side and wiggles like he's stroking out, which is clownfish for "I GIVE UP!"(I will pointedly avoid saying something to the affect of "remindes me of my house", but you probably knew that if you are married). once he does that, they go back to being best friends again. They swim everywhere together. He panics if he loses sight of her.