OT: Turkey Table Tension

[caitrina]

This morning I opened up my browser and there in front of me was the page I should not have seen today. The headline read "How to cope with family tension at the table" When I first read the headline all I could think about is just how far this society has gotten from the meanings of holidays. It is bad enough that you see Christmas in some stores as early as September and Valentines things before January has really even gotten started. There used to be a few holidays that never really received too much attention and Thanksgiving was one of them and OMG now they are jumping on the band wagon to "fix" our society and it's family tensions at the table.

Perhaps if family's interacted a bit more the tensions might not be at the table. It's probably rare for some to actually sit down and have a meal together. Of course there will be tension, they aren't used to sitting at a table without their noses in a TV or newspaper.

The person who cooked the meal probably did it alone while cleaning or tidying the house for all those guests that were going to plop themselves at her / his table, eat, act like pigs and then get up and leave without lifting a finger, other than putting fork to mouth.

So they really want to "fix" the table tension through an online article or a 60 second clip on the news? I don't think it really takes a psychologist to do that for one maybe two BIG dinners a year. Simply look around your table and think of what you might feel if there was an empty space no longer to be filled by that person. I bet that table tension disappears rather quickly. Well, I guess unless you really hated them, then you might think differently.

So today when you look around the table at everyone instead of hating each other or another like I have heard said in anger and instead of arguing about water top offs and vying to see who is right and taking the everyday garbage to the table and causing tension be thankful the space you might see isn't final. OK, I am off my soap box now.

I hope that everyone has a GREAT THANKSGIVING! Now I have two families I have to visit, my husband's family and our Motorcycle Club. BE SAFE!

[Witfull]

i live next to Philadephia. it has the highest murder rate of any city! so im sure there will be some tensions,,,im predicting 5 shooting with 2 fatalities.

so next time you want to see the city of brotherly love,,,bring a bullet proof vest~

[Frankie]

I kill the table tension by tossing on some worship and praise music and actually helping my wife with getting things ready. Also ridding my life and house of alcohol has brought family values back into my life and home. You would be surprised at how "easing the tension" with alcohol can turn into a bad ending and where most of what Witty was talking about stems from.

[Witfull]

we are trading off in the kitchen....i prep the bird, she makes the stuffing,,i get told to stuff it~

then i get to lift it out every half hour for butter or basting. i peel potatoes and boil them up, she makes the mashed potatoes. green bean cassarole is all her. i make all the garish sides-green and black olives-cranberry, celery, cheese ball and crackers. then when its all good and yummy, I carve and serve

THEN comes the kids turn-----DISHES!!!!!

[tbittner]

I SO agree with you Frankie. Alcohol = trouble... And it truly doesn't have a place at a family gathering with children.

I agree Wit. The family that COOKS together, stays together.

I love to cook and my wife gleefully lets me do my thing. I have a bit of selfishness to it though too. I cook what I like!

[Witfull]

im not allowed to touch any spices or season anything.....this is her meal~

[kathywithbirds]

Hey, Wit, is Camden still the most violent? Think that was based on violent crime, not just murders. We live in such a cool area.

Oh, TENSION!! Here's my day so far: Mike is on duty, I have the little one who has decided to be such a terror that I locked her in the bedroom so she could have her tantrum in peace. She's one of the ones that can go for HOURS. She doesn't do it often, but when she does dear god, look out. Fought me on everything this morning: pancakes, yes. NO, no no pancakes, eggs! after I made pancakes, having a fit about th eeggs. Won't sit at the table, no food into her yet. THEN doesnt' want to bathe, fights me on a shower, THEN doesn't want to wear this, yes, this one... when it's on NO NO its not long enough, I dont' want the footless tights, NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO... I told her that's what she's wearing and she loses it. She loves dresses but it's a PITA, so I stripped her and put her in sweats. OH NO we cnat' wear sweats, NO NOT THOSE SHOES!!!!! and here we go. kicking, screaming, whole 9 yards. So to avoid losing it myself, she goes in the bedroom to have her session. I sit on the stairs listening to her go and wonder if child services is coming to get us.

[tbittner]

Oh wow Kathy! And now we know why some species EAT their young!

[DrHank]

I'm lucky this year with only 3 hours of tension. We eat late about 6PM. We tell my wife's folks to come about 5PM. They actually arrive about 7:30PM. I've already eaten. I'm not waiting for 2.5 hours for them to show up. Everything is in the kitchen so you help yourself. I gave up trying to serve everyone years ago when they decided to show up when they want. I have to choose between socializing (hearing the same old complaints and stories) or heading for the computer and hearing my wife and daughters complain about my not spending time with the family for the next week.

Fortunately I can be thankful that Thanksgiving comes only once a year.

[Rcpilot]

No tension at the table with our family. We all LIKE each other. I fixed my mother-in-laws roof last summer. Go ice fishing with my wifes oldest brother, multiple times every year. I think my mother-in-law is a nice woman, but a bit nosey. No big deal. I like my father-in-law and he thinks I'm just great. The MIL cooked the turkey and we brought over the yams and pies. Everyone brings a little something. My sister-in-laws green bean casserole is the best in the world. All the kids play together.

AND, all the adults had a nice glass of white zin and toasted to our wonderful family. Right in front of the kids! Alcohol is no big deal for us. I guess it's because nobody ever had an addiction to it. All good things in moderation.

Gobble Gobble!! Happy Turkey Day to all!

[cracker]

There was a little tension today. My Mom has a really big exercise ball. It was easy to talk my 8 yr old niece to see if she could stand on & walk the ball down the hall. Hey I didn't think her Mom would disapprove!!