The crutches are me being stupid. Long story short I fell in the garage Sunday night and landed with all of my weight on my right kneecap. The bone is not broken but the cartilage is either broken or bruised. Apparently the only way to tell is an MRI. The doc and I agreed to take the wait and see approach for a couple of weeks. I am in a huge brace thing and on crutches for two weeks and then we re-evaluate. If it is bruised it should be a lot better. If it isn't then off to MRI land and probable surgery. I'm going with the bruised option.
Bad as the crutches are I can deal with that for a couple of weeks rather than the other.
Can I ever actually make a long story short? I really don't think I can do it.